Dude 101 the dating handguide to navigate through the current dating market

DUDE 101

(excerpt) Love is an equal opportunity killer so adjust the genders involved to fit your situation.

KNIGHTS, PRINCES, KINGS

Guys fall into categories of royalty: Knights, Princes, and Kings.  A Knight is in his 20’s.  A Prince is in his 30’s and Kings are in his 40’s and above.  You should be aiming for that royalty status in your life.

A King can be as young as thirty-five if he’s evolved spiritually.  You graduate from each title by doing the life work.  The King rules until death whenever that may be.  He is the highest most put together on the ranks.

20’s and above: THE KNIGHT.

Picture the knight dashing from adventure to adventure.  Once he has done that and caught his handsome Prince, then what?  It will be great for a little while, but not sustainable.  The Prince will be off on his next escapade.  If the Knight reaches Baron status in his mid to late twenties, he may be ready for a relationship, but you’ll have to tread carefully.

In your 20’s, you’re figuring out who you are and what you want to do.  Those in their 20’s get frustrated forcing you to guess their wishes and becoming erratic and splitting if you don’t.  They have not been cooked long enough to hatch.  The arguments I get from those in there 20’s are, “I’m more mature than anyone my age”.  Wait 10-15 years and imagine what you’ll know then!

Men in there 20’s are looking for novelty, rather than a connection.  They play with the big boys, but eventually wander off sulking and insulted with their tale between their legs when it doesn’t go according to plan.

The Knights World. Population One.

The first thought when a Knight sees one he likes is, ‘Do I want to have sex with him?’  That cuts out a big chunk right away.  At that stage of their life, they’re not particularly looking for anything long lasting and they shouldn’t be.  They have one burning desire: to build a successful career.  When it comes to a potential mate, he wants a guy who looks good next to him so he can show the world, “Hey, I must be cool to attract such a hot dude.”  Emphasis is all on how he and this other guy appear and the illusion revolving around that status.  Knights have a difficult time holding an interest in one person for anything longer than a month or two.

There is hope at the end of this semi-artificial tunnel of youth: As men in their twenties age, they begin learning from experience.  You are knocked around a few times and you realize a pretty face is not everything.  You figure out that your polished exterior no longer stays that way on its own.  Can’t party like you used to as it takes much longer to recover.  If you’ve spent too much time fucking around in your twenties you will find that everyone has passed you up by climbing the ladder in life as you’re turning thirty.

30’s and above: THE PRINCE.

Chivalry is not dead and you come to terms with that in your 30’s.  The Prince could very well be your Prince Charming.  The 30’s brings a level of self-awareness you never dreamed possible.  It is what I like to call the 4 S’s: You are smarter, stronger, sane, and stable.  You do not care to engage in bullshit.  You want the same thing in return to match it power for power.  A hot ass will turn a guy’s head in his 30’s, but it will be the gray matter that keeps him interested in the end.  Polish up on your current events and do it quickly!

Your tastes change and you are done with the initial experimental stage when it comes to dating.  You look for a guy who fills certain roles like a husband, father, or brother, even if you are not interested in forming a family.  You are improving your tastes.  It’s no surprise that men and women in there 20’s often get weak in the knees over some Romeo who is at least ten years older than them, hence the status and confidence that comes with being in ones thirties.

Men in there 30’s are an emotional Sage and better lovers.  They offer more stability and tend to have more money than their younger Knights.  The Prince knows what he wants and what he doesn’t want.  He avoids playing mind games as he knows it’s a waste of time.  He’s more responsible with a full life and he’s not following you around like a puppy dog.  His relationships are more serious and enjoyable.

40’s and above: THE KING

Boys—I would like to introduce you to a man you should be watching, studying, stalking and taking plentiful notes on, for he is your lord and savior.  Emulate this man and you will go far in life.  Don’t and you will fail at everything you do.  Who is this beacon of light in a world cast in darkness?  He is the King sitting high up on his thrown and out of reach.

In your 40’s, a roll in the hay is nice, but you are more eager for substance in a companion. You prefer a strong partner at your side, one that nurtures you and who is caring.  If you are up for this tough job, the 40’s man may be yours for the taking.  He’ll know within seconds if you’ve got what it takes.  He needs a guy to back him up all the way.  He is burned out and needs to share his success with someone worthy, highly advanced or aiming in that direction.

As a King, he is wiser than anyone else and more interested in the character of the person, than the package it comes in.  They want a dude who is equally giving as they are taking.  He needs and thrives for balance.  Men in there 40’s are more youthful and bouncier than in previous generations.  The true King expects you to contribute your part.  He’s not going to take care of a slacker.  Don’t be fooled by the ones that are, those aren’t real Kings.  You need to raise his interest level, because he’s seen and done it all at this point and is extra careful with love.  You should be honest, loyal, and trustworthy.  You should be a flexible giver and not a hardheaded taker.  Any emotional scenes will have you banished out of his society, so be ready to hold your own.

Those were some basic guidelines, but even though a guy may be forty-three it doesn’t automatically make him a King.  He could be stuck in the Knight stage.  A twenty-seven year old may already have hit the beginning marks of a true Prince.  There are UN-advanced men in there 40’s who attempt to embarrassingly play with the young ones only to be beaten.  They’ve exuded undignified traits of insecurity when faced with rejection or calamity.  They’re unable to construct a proper sentence when addressing their potential conquest.

CROWN RATING SYSTEM COMPATIBILITY

Knight with Knight: 2 crowns – Will be brief fun until the drab cruel reality sets in.  No direction.  No stability, too much narcissism, and insecurity.  Relationship is based on pettiness and a superficial connection.  It will take much effort from both Knight’s, but neither can hold each other’s interest long enough to even bother to make it through the honeymoon phase.  The relationship will either end abruptly with no warning or in a dramatic face off.

Prince with Knight: 2 ½ crowns – If you work at it and have patience you might make it until the Knight becomes a Prince himself.  The Prince is the only good match for a Knight if he HAS to be in a relationship or die.  Some may choose die – at least for the Prince anyway.  If the Knight hasn’t grown or is not secure enough he’ll feel neglected by his Prince who is out conquering the world.  The Prince will need to meet the Knight more than half way, but this will feel like more work than necessary.  Princes aren’t known for wanting to stop and smell the roses.  His patience will be worn thin and he’ll begin to distance himself from his Knight.  The Knight in return will grow frustrated by the lack of attention and want out, but not before he’s crushed to death by his partner’s aloofness.  This can work if both are more compromising and understanding.  The Knight would have to be more realistic when entering the relationship while the Prince exudes more tolerance with his Knight.  Much can be learned with this duo, but it won’t be without tons of work from both of these guys.

Prince with Prince: 3 crowns – Tons of fun!  This hot and sexy duo has got it made.  Both will leap from adventure to adventure, fighting and conquering the world and everyone in it together.  The only risk is the competitive streak. With both Princes off being victorious with the world when will anyone be home long enough to enjoy this blatant strength?  This will work if both Princes are facing the same direction which most of the time they are.  Sexually these two are off the charts dynamic and hot blooded.  They can’t keep their hands off each other and they’re not afraid to show it.  They’re both at a place where they’re seriously considering the future and who they’d like to settle down with.  They’re done with school, experimenting, partying and they want to focus on one person they can grow older with while having a good time in the process.  Where else can they find a guy who is exactly on the same page battling a similar fight, but with another Prince.  Hot match!

King with Knight: 2 crowns – Will work briefly until the King is no longer amused by his impulsive Knight or the Knight dashes off to play and forgets to return to the Castle.  Much can be learned on both ends.  The King will learn to be more playful and lighten up and the Knight will learn to be more serious, committed and goal oriented.  This duo has a gap to deal with where both are experiencing completely different things at various points in their lives.  Compassion and a willingness to take into account what the other is encountering is the kicker.  Both are too absolved in their own personal dilemmas that they’ll start to wish they were with someone else who understood what they were going through.  May be fun for a while, but will soon grow tired and annoying.

The Knight looking for a King to take care of everything will only run into issues.  One Knight placed an ad looking for King who made at least $200,000 a year because the other King’s were earning $50,000 and that wasn’t getting him into a Palace.   The King, an investment banker who replied to it, said that since his money would grow over time and the Knight’s beauty would fade, the offer didn’t make good business sense.  The Knight was, as the King said, “A depreciating asset”

 

King with King: 4 crowns – Great minds think alike, but who will rule and be King?  Both?  It depends on the Kings.  Luckily that’s a minor issue that rarely reveals its ugly head.  The great thing is that both Kings are perfectly happy to share the spotlight and prefer it.  It makes their relationship much more resilient.  They’ve already sowed their oats and will most likely be established and calmer, ready for a beautiful lifelong relationship with a guy who is on an equal footing.  There will be no telling what they can overcome together.  This union screams power couple.  All the elements are here, stability, backbone, loyalty, romance, and camaraderie.  They appreciate a stable home life and a loving relationship to retreat to and they can both find it in each other with ease and little effort.

King with Prince: 4 crowns – Can you say Sherlock Holmes and Watson?  Simply Bliss.  It’s all here.  One gives the other enough perfection and balance to keep this flying smoothly for a lifetime.   The lows in this relationship are rare and generally overcome with minimal effort.  Both feel safe and protected with one another.  The Prince has enough maturity and much to offer the King.  He’s been through the ringer enough as a Knight and is looking for a guy who understands him and can give him that relationship he’s dreamed of.  He’ll get that with the King who will be the Captain who finds a willing crew in the Prince.  Each lightens the load for the other while offering undying loyalty and a partner for life.  The Prince will back the King up like no other and even take over.  There is a real buddy system here and the gap between them is at the right spot that ensures solidity.  The Prince defends the King to no ends, but the King sees a bit more and that ends up saving the Prince.

Let’s look at the Sherlock Holmes/Watson scenario in a King/Prince situation:

There’s a scene in the Sherlock Holmes film where Holmes and Watson are rescuing a maiden from the bad guy.  Watson rushes impulsively to attack the villain and is blocked quickly by Holmes.  Holmes says, “Look.”  He takes his cane and points to a piercing glass coming into view that could kill someone in a pinch aimed inches at Watson.  Watson says, “How did you know that was there?”  Sherlock says, “Because I was looking for it.”

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About Kevin Hunter

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Posted on February 13, 2013, in Dating (Social Customs), Dude Lit, Gay, Kevin Hunter Author Writer, Love and Relationships, Trashy Beach Reads, Young Adults and tagged . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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