Ask Jagger: My Dates Drop Off the Face of the Earth

Dear Jagger,

I know this is probably the same everywhere, but why is it so hard to find guys that actually wanna date?  A couple weeks ago I had a few first dates set up. On two of them we had a great time. But yet afterwards they pretty much just dropped off the face of the earth. I was interested in getting to know them better but yet it doesn’t seem I will get the chance. It doesn’t seem like these were guys that were looking for hookups so I don’t think that was the reason we haven’t hung out again. It just frustrates me that after having good dates, guys disappear. Not to be cocky but I think I am a reasonably attractive guy. I have a good job. I am a nice person. But yet it seems to be extremely difficult for me to get past first dates. Starting to think I must be doing something wrong or not ‘playing’ the game correctly.

Signed,

Anonymous.

Dear Anonymous,

Welcome to the modern day dating world.  It’s a sad reality, but true.  The internet and ease of finding people have locked people behind bars at home searching for another one to meet with.  You have also proven that theory by shot gun dating yourself.  On the one hand that’s great to set up a situation where you’re speed dating through several people in a week, but that can be way too much work getting to know someone which takes time.  It’s possible that that was likely showing with the two guys you actually did like.  They may have felt as if they were on a job interview, because essentially you were probably talking to all of them about the same things.  Pace yourself when dating and focus on one date at a time.  This is not a contest or a race to the finish line.  This will improve your chances on finding someone who actually sticks around.

If you have a question you’d like answered specifically around dating, relationships, love or any other pressing issue then shoot an email to “Ask Jagger” at dudelit@gmail.com  Be sure to leave certain information that you feel applies to your case whether you’re straight, gay, male or female.  Your name will not be used unless you approve.

Jagger is featured in the books “Jagger’s Revolution” about finding his current relationship and Jagger’s dating hand guide, “Dude 101“.  Jagger is the dark alter ego of writer Kevin Hunter. All advice and information is intended as a general guide and for entertainment purposes only. 

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Copyright © 2012 Kevin Hunter

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Posted on December 12, 2012, in Advice Column, Ask Jagger, Ask Kevin Hunter, Dating (Social Customs), Kevin Hunter Author Writer, Young Adults and tagged . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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